Comically Inept Spam Scam

I received this email with a subject line of "My Heart Choose You".

Dear friend

I am Mrs Cindy Buker and i have been surffering from ovarian cancer disease and the doctor says that i have just two days to leave. I am from (Mississippi) USA but based in Africa Burkina Faso since Nine years ago as a business woman dealing with gold exportation.

Now that i am about to end the race like this,without any family members and no child.I have 3 Million US DOLLARS in Coris Bank Burkina Faso which i instructed the bank to give St Andrews Missionary Home in Burkina Faso.But my mind is not at rest because i am writting this letter now through the help of my computer beside my sick bed.

I also have 4.5Million US Dollars at Ecobank here in Burkina Faso and i instructed the bank to transfer the money to the first foreigner that will apply to the bank after i have gone that they should release the fund to him/her,but you will assure me that you will take 50% of the money and give 50% to the orphanages home in your country for my heart to rest. You are to contact the bank through this email address (Russian web site address removed)

Thanks.
Mrs Cindy Buker

You read about this sort of stuff all the time, right? Someone with millions of dollars is near death and they shotgun an email to every man, woman and child in the world telling them that the first one who contacts their bank gets the money.

Yeah, that just happened.