George Nethercutt has one heck of a column
over at the Inlander
. (Note: I logged into the Inlander and wrote a lengthy comment only to be prompted to sign in again, thus losing all my work. Rather than risk doing that again, I'm posting it here instead.)
Mr Nethercutt looked at the numbers and saw that women outnumber men in our country--apparently a rare phenomenon to him that's been true for 60 years now
--and has somehow divined that 2012 is the year
women can influence a national election...um...after lying dormant for three generations. Plus, it's been two centuries so aren't we about due?
By the way, four women governors of note were elected in Arizona, New Mexico, Oklahoma and South Carolina which are states representing the fastest growing demographic, Latinos. Mr Nethercutt makes no further mention of Latinos. For some strange reason he's pointing out that there are more and more Latinos every day. He has nothing else to say about all those Latinos. So...many...frickin'...Latinos. Lots and lots of Latinos. Fastest growing demographic. Latinos every-fuckin'-where. Almost scary, isn't it?
Okay, back to electing a female president. Mr Nethercutt, a serious look on his very concerned face, slowly--no reluctantly--turns over a presidential prediction tarot card. It's an experienced diplomat and senator of acceptable age. (Yes, he said "acceptable age". Read the stupid column
.) Hilary Clinton! He turns the next card. Good looks and an everywoman resistance to sophistication. (I told you. Did you read the stupid column
?) You betchya! I mean, Sarah Palin! And she's a political rock star. OMG!
Neither woman is Mr Nethercutt's choice, but it IS
time for a female president because women outnumber men and it's been two centuries. Apparently he can think of no other women who have the experience, the good looks, the acceptable age, the ability to raise money, the good looks, the total ignorance and incuriousness behind a pretty smile, the ability to raise money, and those ever lovin' good looks. Mr Nethercutt can't think of any other women other than the two he wouldn't choose. But the cards have spoken.
I almost skipped over the good part. Mr Nethercutt informs us that "Americans have tried the Barack Obama experiment — the election of a liberal, minority president with no real-world experience and a thin resume — and found it wanting."
I'm afraid it's not for the reasons he lists. You see, Republicans wouldn't allow minority man to get anything meaningful accomplished unless minority man used the majorities he had in both houses--just like non-minority presidents have done. The nerve of that minority man. Plus he tried to talk to Republicans like he was their equal. He tried to include Republicans in discussions and negotiations. He reached out to them like...like he was just as good as them. Sometimes he came across like he was superior, even making Republicans look bad at a get together they invited him to. These last two years have been a struggle for Republicans and their patience has been sorely tested. Why one Republican even called minority man a liar. To his face. On TV! It's not like he didn't have it coming. Numerous Republicans don't believe minority man was even born in America and you'll find that in publications more reputable than the National Enquirer. Even Congresswoman Cathy McMorris Rodgers, who succeeded Mr Nethercutt, said "I'd like to see the documents," when she was asked about it.
From the tenor of Mr Nethercutt's column, it's apparent we've done the minority man experiment--which has failed--and now we're obliged to do the non-minority woman experiment. And we must choose between two non-minority women who are not of his choosing. For his sake, let's hope it's the pretty one. And then after that we can return to having a non-minority man in charge, you know, just like the founding fathers.
Mr Nethercutt says America is leaning right and minority man's attempt to move us towards the left just won't do. Nope, our country needs to lean to the right until it falls down. Face plant, America! Face plant! But wait until we complete the non-minority woman experiment. Then
we can get down to business.
And don't forget to watch out for all those Latinos.